#23: Inferno: What In Hell Is Happening?

"Dirty" Tom Hanks stars in this terrible new film. 

There are not many good things to say about the new film Inferno. In fact, there might not be any. It's horrible. Truly excruciating to bear. Fortunately, with special guest David Spitz at our side, we find plenty to snob about re: this terrible offering from washed-up director Clint Howard. The newest film in the Dan Brown adaptation-series that began with 2006’s The Da Vinci Code, Inferno follows the misadventures of ole Robby Langdon (played by Tom “Chilly-T” Hanks) as he follows a new trail of symbols. But hey, this time he has amnesia! So what’s been happening in the past? Why is he here? Why are any of us here, watching this horrible movie? Some questions are not meant to be answered, which is the premise upon which Clint Howard’s new film is founded. Should you choose to see Inferno, know fully that you are choosing to descend into a place of horror and despair, a place of confusion and chaos, where no pillars of value stand. This is an irrelevant movie that should not be seen. So tune into this new episode of General Snobbery! You don’t want to miss it! 

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This painting by Botticelli is important in Inferno, I think. 

#20: Roland Emmerich Liked Our Tweet

At seven twenty-five PM, on Tuesday, the eleventh of October in the year two thousand and sixteen, Roland Emmerich "liked" one of General Snobbery's tweets. 

@BillyPullman, the King of New York

If you have been following General Snobbery throughout these twenty episodes, you will know that we have launched a campaign to #LetUsWriteID3. Essentially, we think that, due to our heightened understanding of Roland Emmerich's intentions, as well as our limitless appreciation for Independence Day: Resurgence (most notably the character of Dikembe Umbutu), we are the most qualified people to help Roland write the script for Independence Day 3. Indeed, as Andy Dufresne wrote a letter every day to receive books in the Shawshank library, so we have tweeted @ Roland every day since launching our campaign. 

Why, you may wonder, did Roland suddenly decide to grace our evening with a like? Certainly he'd noticed the previous 60-70 tweets we had sent at him? We believe the sudden liking can mean only one thing: he has finally decided to give us a chance. He has finally decided to #LetUsWrite ID3. 

In the immediate aftermath of the Twitter notification, we scrapped all previously-held plans for our monumental twentieth episode and instantly began recording this episode that now greets your sacred ears. In this excited conversation, we showcase our passion for our new devoted listener, Roland Emmerich. We offer up some teasers for ID3. We propose our meeting place in LA, offering even to foot the bill for the meal and use our Southwest Points to fly out there. 

It's all an exuberant appreciation for the unexpected delights of life. We thank you, listener, for joining us. When the moment comes that Roland sends us a DM with the plan, know that that DM is coming not only to us, but also to you. In the end, we will all be writing the script for ID3, and as we do, we will all be snobbing the whole way home. 

#19: Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom, Carl Jung, and the Power of Images

Indiana Jones, looking yoked at the film's climax.

It's become common knowledge that it's best to avoid Indian Death Cults. This knowledge has come largely in thanks to Steven Spielberg's Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom, the second of four IJ films, and the first in the series' chronology. The film portrays Indian Death Cults as pretty bad things, activities that probably should not be practiced on a regular basis, lest you become like the guy in the picture below, wearing large horns and a shrunken head as a hat.

This film is dark. Extremely dark, in fact. So dark that Steven Spielberg, great director of Empire of the Sun, The Adventures of Tin-Tin, and The Terminal, has all but disavowed it. Nevertheless, we at General Snobbery greatly appreciate its darkness, darkness that does not exclude depicting the tearing out of human hearts and a fat man's consumption of live, slimy snakes. Thus, we give to you a lengthy consideration of the merits of this second Indiana Jones film, as well as an explication of how its horror depicted has had lasting impact on the development of our psyches. 

Just to be sure we got sufficiently pretentious, we entreat considerations of Carl Gustav Jung, Swiss psychologist/sage, explicating his theories on the power of images. We are certain that Jung, plagued by dark images as he was during his years of writing the Liber Novus, would have appreciated this film. We hope that you appreciate it as well, listener, and we thank you, as always, for joining us on this snobbing journey.

Malo Ram, wielding the heart of the poor human sacrifice in the background.